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What is a "Parent Coach"...
...and why would you use one?
"Parent Coaching", like any type of coaching, is a useful therapy or modality used to help develop a parent or caregivers skills and abilities when it comes to parenting. It is also a place for parents to discuss challenges, disruptive behaviours and gather information and resources to best support their child and family.
The Children's Council of Health describes Parenting Coaching as "a type of therapy where parents and caregivers learn how to use specific skills and strategies to address behavioral challenges and/or support their child's development. A parent coach is a certified professional with expertise in evidence-based strategies to address a wide array of challenges. They can help you look at the big picture and offer a neutral perspective.
Your parent coach can work with you to implement individualized strategies and help you troubleshoot and adjust as you go. They can educate, support, and empower you to become the parent you want to be. Parent coaches are mental health therapists with expertise in parenting and child development, and you are the expert on your child. You will work together as a team to find solutions that work for you and your family. "
Parent Coaching for Adoptive and/or Foster Families
At TMP, we get it; parenting is hard! When you add in the complexities of adoption, early trauma, and other factors adoptive and foster families face, that "hard" can sometimes feel overwhelming. Families in crisis sometimes don't have the time or emotional bandwidth to review books on trauma or sign up for an upcoming course or workshop, and need support in this moment. A Parent Coach can work with your family to help understand your child's behaviour, understand the unique constellation of your family, and then work with you to create a game plan - like any good coach would do!
BEFORE ADOPTION: Some families use a Parent Coach pre-emptively before placement to address any possible challenges or issues they foresee arising. A Parent Coach can also help you to "problem solve" how to handle well-meaning family and friends who may not understand the unique attachment needs your child will have.
DURING ADOPTION TRAVEL: Other families have utilized the services of a Parent Coach during their adoption trip in order to talk through transition and bonding concerns they may have. A Parent Coach can help you pinpoint the area of concern, and then work with you to develop a plan moving forward. These first few weeks can be challenging for the entire family, and it can be hard to "problem solve" when the entire family is exhausted and stressed. A Parent Coach can help you identify how your family can move through these first few weeks as painlessly as possible.
POST ADOPTION: Others seek out a Parent Coach once they are home and their child has settled in a bit. It is common for adoptive and foster families to experience a "honeymoon period" in which the child seems to seamlessly transition, but as they begin to feel safe, display behaviours that surprise even the most experienced of adoptive families. In other cases, the siblings may be struggling to adapt to this new "normal" and families require support to help everyone transition. Often the child will bond quickly to one caregiver, leaving the other with all kinds of feelings that are difficult (and yet crucial) to process.
Many families feel alone and isolated after placement, and like those around them "just don't get it". While we believe that "behaviour is the voice of the child", we know through experience that it can feel like we speak a different language! At TMP, we have lived through many of these same issues with our own families, and are here to support your family through these challenging times.
Parent Coaching (General)
Of course, it is not just adoptive or foster families that can benefit from the use of a Parenting Coach! While parenting can be extremely rewarding, it can also present us with many challenges that leave us overwhelmed and exhausted.
We may have sworn to ourselves before becoming a parent that we would do things differently than our own parents, yet find ourselves in similar power struggles, or saying things that we instantly regret. It may be that you are facing a particularly challenging situation, such as a medical diagnosis, divorce or separation, or perhaps your child has received a diagnoses you are trying to process.
A Parent Coach can be your sounding board, and your source of support during specific challenges or just the every day challenges of parenthood! Our coaches have the training, education and life experience to not only listen and walk alongside you in your parenting journey, but also to identify specific resources and work with you to develop a "game Plan" to help you regain equilibrium, peace and a sense of joy in your family structure.